Sorry I've been such the slacker here on the blog lately. Lots going on, as you know, especially if you follow me on Facebook. Let me give you some brief updates here.
Today I went to a funeral for a friend and former colleague of mine. I really don't want to go into too much detail about it, other than to say that I haven't really grieved yet. Usually when something like this happens I have a delayed reaction--a VERY delayed reaction--and I don't grieve until four or five days after the death's happened. So I'm just waiting for the moment when I can finally break down and feel some relief.
I am housesitting, and have been since October 1st. This is for the same friend who had the butter-eating dog a few months back. Not to worry, I don't plan on doing any baking right now. However, the other dog has been dragging my clean, folded laundry all over the house. I thought I had put it out of reach by stacking it high on the dining room table. Maybe the cat has been knocking the clothing off when I'm not there.
I will be here till the 17th. I've never been away from home for so long--in my adult life, that is. I get to visit my cats every other day, check on them, see if they're okay. And they are. But I miss them something awful--especially right now. I haven't had a lazy, do nothing day at home in a very long time. I just want a Saturday afternoon to chill on the couch, catch up with my DVR shows, and have the kitties in my lap. Yes, I know that sounds incredibly selfish--and it is. But it's what I'm craving right now.
The other day I told my BFF that I had never been happier, professionally or personally. I then added that I hope I didn't jinx myself by saying that. Now I wonder if I have...or maybe this is a temporary setback. I hope it is.
I have a long weekend. I was excited about it at first, but now, not so much. Saturday I'm getting my car serviced--AGAIN. Stupid belts have been giving me a lot of grief, but I'm going to the dealership, and they're good at what they do. Sunday I was supposed to go apple picking with BFF, but I found out that A) I have to sing at church, and B) I am going to sit shiva Sunday night with my friend's family. Normally I could balance all of these activities--if I were at my OWN home and if I didn't have dogs to let out. Now again, I like housesitting and I enjoy dogs, but with everything going on, and everything I want to do, it's been difficult scheduling my life around letting them out--and they have to be let out every four hours, given that one of them has urinary issues. I hope that I can get someone to let them out on Sunday while I'm gone.
So, anyhoo, I'm in a funk right now. I know that this will pass, but it's just a lot to deal with in a short time. Thanks, as always, for letting me vent.
10 comments:
Hope things get better soon. So sorry about your loss. Snuggle up with a good book and just relax, if possible. Hugs.
I hope the venting helped!
Now, make the best of it and keep the butter away from the dog! (My cat eats onions - wanna trade?)
You just need to bring your kitties over to help house sit with you. I'm sure the dogs won't mind!
I'm so sorry for your loss. Hugs.
"I know that this will pass, but it's just a lot to deal with in a short time"
That's it in a nutshell.
You are in no way being selfish to take a long deserved and awaited day to yourself! Enjoy it-take care of YOU. A death will throw a wrench into anyone's good times...let yourself grieve as it comes. No pressure-no timeline. Just let the natural course of things happen. And I'm so sorry for your painful loss.
The dog and cat are in cahoots, by the way. BEWARE the resentful left behind pets!
Hugs to you. Ordered my Deva stufff! Can't wait!
What a good friend you are to do this for your friend. I can't imagine being away from Harley for 17 days. I would be venting right along with you!! It is too bad you couldn't bring your cats along with you. I know sometimes dogs and cats don't mix, but if you could give them a room to stay in so you can get your kitty fix more often.
I am sorry to hear that you are in a funk these days. I totally understand that when you are not yourself you start to shut down a bit. Last year when something similar happened with me I was hardly on the computer and talked to no one and the only thing I wanted to do was snuggle my puppies! Hope things start to get better for you soon
I'm so sorry for your loss. Believe me, I can relate to what you are feeling with grief or the "lack" of it. It can be a tricky emotion to deal with. Don't beat yourself up if you don't "follow the rules" of how to grieve.
And you are one dedicated housesitter but I bet it does get old after awhile.
It is always good to vent, thinking of you!
Whenever there is a death of someone close to me I get in a funk. It makes me totally rethink life.
I'm sorry for your friend's passing.
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