Kitten Confessions, Part Seven

My name is Kitten, and I read the comics the way some watch soap operas.

I don't know why I get so caught up in comic strips and their storylines. Currently, in For Better or for Worse, the Pattersons' eldest daughter, Elizabeth, is finally marrying Anthony. It was stated, however, in a previous strip, that the wedding would not take place until August 23rd, which is two weeks from now. Right now they're profiling all of the activity leading up to the big moment. Which leads me to wonder: Is something catastrophic gonna happen that will postpone the big event? The suspense is killing me!

Then I wander over to Sally Forth. Since Memorial Day, Sally and Ted have been trying to have another baby. Their daughter, Hilary, is ten years old, going on eleven, and during the past two weeks, Sally and Ted have been telling Hilary about how they purchased their first house. Well, enough with the suspense! Is Sally preggers, or isn't she? Only her creator knows, and he ain't telling!

And then there's Funky Winkerbean, which is as close to reality as you can get in the comics. This week, Les and Summer are back in the neonatal ICU for a reunion of all of the babies who had been there sixteen years prior. Summer, as many Funky fans will recall, was a preemie. I really got tied up in this strip last year when Les's wife, Lisa, was dying of cancer, and I actually cried when I read the strips leading up to her death and funeral.

Why do I get tied up in these situations? I have to occasionally remind myself, "These are only comic strips!" Most of the people I know occupy themselves with the latest plotlines of various TV shows, but not me. I feel that I can't go a week with the suspense of not knowing what'll happen next. With the comics, there's a feeling of instant gratification; I only have to wait for the next day to find out what's going on.

Only lately, the comics have gotten a lot craftier, what with the examples I've mentioned above. Thankfully, I read all of my comics online; they're among the first sites I go to when I first log onto the Internet in the morning. That, in addition to checking my E-mail, I also read the obituaries first thing.

But that's another Kitten Confessional for another time.